Canuck Monopoly

I find myself owning more board games at this juncture of life. Could it be the under age group residing in my household that dictates this use of time and mental bandwidth? It certainly contributes.
The real reason is the weather. As we await the impending weather here in Toronto we do what any California transplant does- buys more non-local wine of the red varietal, and more board games.
The newest of the boxed bunch- City Monopoly. This version allows you to build high rises and sewage treatment plants next door to your neighbors with very little regard for local planning. This newest variety got me thinking about how many genres of Monopoly there really could be. The capitalist bent of the game is always the competitive, capitalistic, money hoarding and free wheeling American psyche brought to it's simplest form: an evening of togetherness. Capitalist tendencies do coincide with Canadian cultural habits but in such a humbled form the tendencies seem like the mere shadow of what they represent.

Enter the newest idea for a board game (yes, it's my own idea) Cunuck Monoploy.
This version of the game has very little in common with it's sibling from the states. First off, it's all about complacency. And hockey.

The rules of my version of Canadian Monopoly would be as follows: If you say something rude to the TTC driver you must attend a class. Instead of jail, we have Canadian charm school where one learns the ever popular passive -aggressive way of smiling and waving at your neighbor vs flipping em the bird.
The real estate around the board is heavily suburban-cottage country focus, since the cottage country adjective is so tightly knit to Canadian Identity that it only seems authentic to the rules of the game to include it. Other key real estate on the game board includes bankrupt hockey teams in Arizona. Don't worry though, you'll never be able to buy them.

The big GO on the American gameboard would be replaced with the LCBO or the liquor control board, which exists on the corner end where collecting a salary would be on the American version of the game. Instead of free parking, there's Canadian Tire.

Chance cards offer the following advice and direction: "Go directly to your television and find a curling game. Watch this television channel for 20 min" (which will seem like 2 weeks.) Another chance card might read "go directly to Swiss Chalet and order the french fries with poutine."
( American's who have never head of this: think Denny's greasy french fries smothered in gray gelatinous gravy.)

The game pieces would be as follows: a mitten, a hockey skate, a hockey stick, a hockey puck, a zamboni, a can of Labatt's beer, a woolen hat in red, a chain saw, and a snowmobile.

The winner of the game will be the one with an average amount of money, driving a Buick SUV, and owning a piece of the cottage county with a winter get away at Blue Mountain.

It's so very nice and civilized, this game of Canadian Monopoly. Just remember that complacency replaces strategy. And don't forget to smile a great deal.

Can you tell that today I miss California?

Dilettantish Darkhorse

Cozy can be described as anything that gives you a warm fuzzy feeling in the pit of your soul.

A cafe of recent finding has the cozy affect cornered as my new free wifi hang and coffee connection. Canadian coffee culture is a great deal like the Canadian wine culture: M.I.A.
Why the culinary bitch slap you ask? When placing a coffee order the server always asks "what do you like in your coffee" and proceeds to add the cream or sugar or ? to the cup. Yes, I know it's so wrong on so many levels but that's the long and the short of coffee here.

I consider it a Canadian cultural divide.

The Darkhorse cafe on Spidina has all the charm of an uber chic San Francisco hang coupled with the coffee culture akin to Seattle- A true hybrid. Think capitalistic love child cafe. Why the capitalist slam you ask, well this artistically barista-d cafe is more expensive than Starbucks and if you let me geek out with a purely foodie metaphor the Darkhorse cafe is Sonoma to the Toronto coffee oasis as the humble noir grape is to Sonoma. Okay, it's metaphorically a stretch but I think you get where I'm going.

If anything at all is gonna get me through the great white snowy season that awaits, it's great coffee and a cafe vibe that rivals most metropolitan cities: Barcelona comes to mind. Rome too. Perhaps it's a nod to Canadian civility as conceitedness takes a well placed stance at the back of the que right next to snotty and attitude since none of that seems to exist here at the dark horse cafe.

Today it's mixed mob of fashionistas, artist's, geeks, and office types all basking in the vibe.It looks like a deelicious trail mix of humanity.

The weather promises to offer sunshine and warmth, so the excitement level is somewhere between the Easter bunny arriving and an open bar at the Ritz . Yes, really that happy.

Of course just as I state the obvious with my neglected Ray-Bans getting some long overdue use, tomorrow may bring an entirely different vibe to my coffee experience here at the darkhorse, but today it's about as good as it gets here in the fair city of T.O.

Why Is Your Christmas Tree Parked Next To The Halloween Candy?

Remember when you were a kid, how time seemed to crawl ever so slowly by.. The wait for Halloween catapulted you into the big leagues of countdowns..tic tock Christmas is t-minus how many days away??

I only ask because last week I stopped into Ikea only to find trees trimmed in full Christmas celebratory style-ala-ikea. Whaaat? October...so is it me or is it really a stretch?

Who is responsible for this phenomenon? As an ahhm..American, I used to think my twisted culture was the culprit. But alas, sweet Swedish ikea has succumbed to the capitalist cocktail that America shakes and serves up even in these economic times.

Oh yeah, the economy is still being shaken like a snow globe, so it's apropos to have the holiday cha-ching so early in autumn I suppose..

Yes, I like the change of the seasons here in Toronto. The capitalism I thought I left behind...not so much.

Does Santa accept letters from us a wee bit earlier due to our proximity to the pole. Hope so.